3 Signs You Are Playing Small In Life
I watched a good TedX talk featuring Drew Dudley. If you aren’t familiar with Ted Talks and TedX talks, you are missing out! They are incredible resources for knowledge in short, easy to watch clips that will inspire you and educate you.
Mr. Dudley’s TedX talk was titled “Everyday Leadership” and he shared how each of us have impacted someone in some way and we’ve had someone else impact us by a word or deed that may have seemed insignificant but changed our life. His point was that each of us are leaders in some way and I agree with him. I think the problem is that most of us don’t believe we are leaders or don’t want to consider ourselves a leader. I know that was how I thought for a long time – I didn’t think I was a leader and I didn’t want to be a leader anyway – because being a leader comes with responsibility.
Marianne Williamson said it beautifully, “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.”
It’s very similar to how we don’t want to accept the responsibility for our own life. All too often we play small in life. We settle. We get comfortable. It’s safer and really, who wants to play big and risk failure?
I faced fear like that head on when I felt the tug of potential pulling me to pursue being a coach and speaker. I was working in a job that I was happy in, at a great organization where I considered my co-workers almost like family. And yet, there was this pull, this thought, this dream that God had a different path for me. I felt the temptation to ignore it. Play safe, stay comfortable, and forget the dream. I could avoid the fear of stepping out into the unknown by simply saying “No.” It would have been easy to avoid the risk of stepping into the scary world of self-employment, expensive individual insurance policies, and no 401K matching.
We’ve all faced opportunities in life and perhaps made the wrong decision because of that fear of failure. Perhaps you are facing a decision right now about your career or your goals for 2016 and the possibility of failure is staring you down. So, you take the easy choice or don’t make a choice at all, which is the same thing.
And, that’s ok. Perhaps you don’t want to do, have and be more in life – it’s not for everyone and I know that. I’m not here to blame you or point fingers at anyone who chooses to play it safe. But, if you have the potential for MORE….read on for three signs that you might be playing it safe, settling for less or playing too small in the game of life.
You lack energy, enthusiasm, and excitement for your job or work:
You wake up to the sound of the alarm clock and your first thought is “Ugh. It’s morning again. Time to get up and drag myself through the day.” You don’t really look forward to going to work, in fact, you really wish it were Saturday and you were off. You can’t wait to chill out in front of the T.V. tonight and escape all those pesky emails from your co-workers, and those piles of papers on your desk. It’s time to ask yourself – what are you truly passionate about and how can you live your dream instead of dreaming to live?
You thought those little quirks weren’t a big deal – but they are:
Maybe it’s not work that you dread, but coming home afterward. You don’t really want to ask “How was your day?” because you don’t really want to know. It started as the perfect match and you were willing to put up him leaving his dirty socks on the floor or her habit of hitting the snooze button ten times in the morning. You had high hopes for this relationship and thought you would be able to help your significant other change (for the better of course). But, now you realize they don’t want to change – they like who they are. It’s time to have an honest talk about what each of you expects from and is willing to invest into the relationship.
You feel little satisfaction or find no meaning in what you do:
It feels like it’s meaningless. You don’t feel like you are making a difference to anyone and wonder if anyone would miss you when you are gone. Oh sure, they would miss you for a while but the organization would go on without you and really wouldn’t change much if you weren’t there. You get to work, go to the meetings, meet the deadlines (or don’t) but you feel like you aren’t really making an IMPACT on anyone. No one’s life is changed for the better because you are there today. Or perhaps you do make a difference, but feel like something is missing somehow. You are completely competent and do the job well, but it doesn’t give you that satisfaction that you see other people find when completing a job well done. It’s time to discover your purpose in life.
Our deepest fear is that we can do, have and be more because that would require us to step out and do something about it. If we want to embrace the joy of living life to the fullest, then we must be willing to accept responsibility for doing it. If you are seeing or feeling any of these signs in your life, relationship or work, look for my next blog where I’ll share some of the things you can do about it.
Ria is a motivational speaker and certified leadership coach with a passion for helping others make the right choices today to reach their goals tomorrow. Visit her website, www.riastory.com or Contact Ria for information on success coaching or motivational speaking. To sign up for Ria’s complimentary leadership training series, CLICK HERE.